Dinner in Marrakesh

Moroccan Feast

Shish Taouk, Shish Kebab, Cardamom and Lemon Broiled Potatoes, Grilled Marinated Aubergine, Brown Basmati Rice Pilaf, and Fresh Mint Tea

Another full day in the kitchen!  Marinating, slicing, applying Neosporin and Band-Aids when The Mangler (my guardless mandolin) won the first round...  I made both Shish Taouk (chicken breast) and Shish Kebab (steak), and gave the chicken some sweet red bell pepper love while giving the steak a bite with crushed fresh cranberries.  Obviously, not traditional, but tasty.  I didn't have any plain yoghurt, so I used organic whole milk (used only for cooking - we don't drink whole milk - or milk at all) to break it down.

Cubed red potatoes, tossed in their own marinade of lemon, cardamom, mint, and rosemary (okay, and about 40 other spices and juices), are always the hit of my Moroccan cuisine.  Basically, I have to overfill my plate at dinner just to ensure that I have enough left to make a leftover lunch (I don't eat much).

So far, I'm the only one guzzling the tea (although I just switched to my favorite cheap red wine), but I have no problem with that at all.

The rice was full of Italian Flat Leaf Parsley, Julienned Carrots, something that I found in my root veggie bowl that looked like a beige, wrinkled carrot that I couldn't remember buying, but it looked, smelled, and tasted okay, so I sliced it on the beaten-into-submission mandolin, popped a slice in my mouth, and it tasted like a slightly sweet carrot.  So, I julienned that, too (by hand, after the carrot incident), added some minced garlic, used Brown Basmati Rice, then toasted the whole thing before I added the liquid: low-sodium, free-range chicken broth.  Because I didn't want sticky, Chinese take-out rice, I used an extra 1/2 cup of stock.

I marinated the thickly-sliced aubergine (about 3/4"), and broiled that in the oven while Lou was outside grilling the meat.  Set the table, sit, down, and eat was the only thing we had left to do.

Okay, so Uncle Billy didn't eat the rice, but he at least ate the meat and potatoes.  I'm still trying to figure out what to cook to please him, but we're a healthy food household, and I am lost when it comes to a 54-year-old man who goes through two giant Coke Slurpees a day.  I have to just decide to cook the way I usually do (healthy, lots of vegetables), and let him fend for himself.  Who ever pictured me as a nuturer?  If you said, "I did," we're no longer friends.

I hope you all had happy, satisfying meals, and are safely tucked in next to your kitchen bitch.

-Z

Let's Talk About Martinis

Okay, you all know, or have heard of, my kitchen bitch, Lou, a/k/a Mr. Zanne (thanks bnldavid for Mrs. Bnldavid),  Recently, okay, for 3-1/2 f'g years, this weird ass pirate guy has been following me around like my Seeing Eye Bitch, Sammy Davis Jr., Jr. (thank you, Liev Schreiber), sniffing my tail like we're married, then I find out this week that we actually ARE married in some crazy Ukranian head-slapping tradition.  WTF?  Who is this guy?  He tells me that his name is Vitoli, and keeps asking me how he can be of service.

Chop, bitch, chop!  Slice, dice, broil, grill, suck toes, whatever I tell you - what molestable woman in her 30s isn't interested in being worshipped?  Certainly not this one.  I have a toe slave for the next 50 years.  I can live with that.

Oh, back to martinis (sorry, I get off track when it comes to worshipping the Goddess that is Zanne).  Dirty, dirty, dirty, and only potato vodka.  That grain alcohol crap isn't fit for consumption.

What was I talking about???

Oh, for me, chill the glass with ice water, inhale over an open bottle of dry vermouth, exhale into an ice-filled shaker, skip the olives but drain half the brine in the jar into the shaker, and fill the rest with potato vodka.  Shake, pour, and make sure there's enough vodka left for another round.

A cosmo is not a martini.  An apple-tini is not a martini.  Vodka, gin, whatever twirls your skirt, but if you put something called "Pucker" into a martini glass, it's not a martini.

This is going to sound crazy, but it's awesome.  Everything I said above, but switch out pickle brine for the olive brine.  Thos little midgets are best, and I can eat them by the case.